Many Are Called. Few Succeed. Manchester United: Beyond the Promised Land

Poem For The Scouse Bastards

There's a place we know where Scousers go
and it's always lots of fun
you can have a laugh at many things
if you're ready with a pun

You can mock the dead of Munich
be glad that George Best's dead
you can sing a dozen funny songs
of Duncan Edward's head

You can hope that Gary Neville
gets cancer and he dies
throw ammonia at Whiteside
and hope it blinds his eyes

You can even stone an ambulance
where Alan Smith is lying
even if it doesn't overturn
it's bound to be fun trying

You can talk of many pleasant things
with your like-minded mates
but you'll pause to show such reverence
as you pass the Shankly Gates

Where every single Scouser
who ever passed away
must be honoured and respected
have their own special day

Cos Scousers are a special breed
their hearts upon their sleeve
they ask the country to join in
and watch them as they grieve

They celebrate and they respect
each Scouser who departs
they ask that we can shed their tears
and nurse their broken hearts

Yet mention dead of anyone
who doesn't fit their own
they laugh out loud there is no shred
of honour ever shown

They laugh at young men dying
on runways filled with ice
and celebrate that Munich day
and never would think twice

of mocking Harold Shipman's dead
that lived within our city
these wallowers in plastic grief
the masters of self pity

They wave their tin foil silverware
and throw cups filled with shit
to shower on opposing fans
but never will admit

It's "justice for the 96"
but never 39
It's grieving for 'poor' Michael Shields
but not for Heysel dying

It's always everybody else
they're not the ones to blame
it was *Rentboys*, Yorkshire coppers
it's always been the same

We've all shed tears as 96
lay dying on the floor
but our sympathy has long since died
we'll grieve with you no more.

That pretty much sums up all the bad blood between us and em scousers! Nicked it off FightForUnited, a site which champions the "Love United, Hate Glazer" campaign. Check it out!

Hi, we're Marco and Marko from the Netherlands. Welcome to our website! We are two football fanatics with a passion for the world's best football.

We'll be going to the WC in Germany soon, not to support the Netherlands, but to support England! Admit it, no other team goes for the goal with such passion as you English do. So we believe firmly in an English victory. Beckham, Gerrard, Rooney and Lampard - who wouldn't want to see them play together! We've already bought tickets for all of England's matches. But there is still a lot we do not know about your team. That's why we made this website. So do you have any tips on how we can support England better? Any and all tips would be greatly appreciated!

These dudes are shyt funny. So far, theyre supporting the USA, England and the Aussies. Theyve created a website for each of the teams with a wicked video to go along as well!

Chinese University Bans Teachers From 'Super Short' Skirts

A Chinese university has banned "super-short" skirts on its teachers, citing the need to maintain a certain distance from the students, state media says.

Only days after the new rules were announced at the Shanghai Normal University, they have triggered a heated debate among its more than 200 female teachers, the Beijing Times says.

It did not specify what "super-short" means. Some of the teachers have complained that they too have a right to be fashionable and a number of students support them, the papers says.

Well, im pretty sure the university's results are going to go down the gutter! There's nothing more inspiring than a hot arsed teacher!